Let’s Put More Spark in that Olympic Flame!

(Authors note:  The following article is strictly for entertainment purposes.  I wish every athlete a safe and enjoyable Olympic experience.)  GW-T

Every four years we watch the same thing over and over again.  Winter or summer, these sports are predictable and frankly, dull.  My interest is growing thinner than a runway model.  I propose to fix them up and pretty much eliminate the need for judges. In most events, the last man standing would win!  I bet the ratings would soar and it would draw more folks than a donut stand at a “Biggest Loser” casting call!

Here are a some of my tamer suggestions:
Biathlon: Wouldn’t it be more interesting if instead of stopping and shooting at targets, they shot paint balls at each other?  The one who comes out clean wins!

Curling:  Just about anything would make this sport more exciting, but why not toss on some dirt/trash on the ice for them to actually sweep up?  Mark and Audra suggested summer curling—you had to be done before the ice melts.  This might speed up the competition, which it badly needs.  It's like watching paint dry.

Speed Skating:  Go fast, turn left.  Ho-hum.  Do you remember Roller Derby?  Let them fight it out!  Can we add hurdles or an obstacle course?

Bobsled/Luge:  Those folks are always complaining they can’t see.  Send them down headfirst!  Why not race several at a time like those slides where you sit on the burlap bag?

Ski/Snowboard Jumping:  Give them something to jump over like Evil Knievel—a few buses perhaps?

Beach Volleyball:  I still don't see it as an Olympic sport, but maybe if they played in a pit of Jell-o...

Since the horses don’t win anything and they do all the work, why not just make the riders run the course in the Three Day Eventing?

Watching folks run in circles for hours isn’t great television, so why not have them run on a motocross track or in some kind of maze?  If they have to carry a baton for the Relay races, why not have them twirl it?

Why do they still call it Figure Skating?  That part of the competition is so boring they don't even show it.  By the time they hit that level, they darn well had better be able to skate a figure "8."  However, I would be interested in watching them skate a figure "1,293,742."

Swimmers might set more world records if they were swimming in ice water.

We would all watch Water Polo if they rode horses …they're just hanging around munching hay anyway since I freed them up from Three Day Eventing.

I am sure that nothing will change, but I do feel better throwing my two cents in.  Please comment with any suggestions you have to improve the Olympic Games.  I'd love to hear them!

Enjoy the games!

Gale

FYI: (Taken from zanecky.com)

What do the Olympic rings signify?

According to most accounts, the rings were adopted by Baron Pierre de Coubertin (founder of the modern Olympic Movement) in 1913 after he saw a similar design on an artifact from ancient Greece.  The five rings represent the five major regions of the world: Africa, the Americas, Asia, Europe, and Oceania. Every national flag in the world includes at least one of the five colors, which are (from left to right) blue, yellow, black, green, and red.  It is important to emphasize that Pierre de Coubertin never said nor wrote that the colors of the rings were linked with the different continents
The Olympic Flag made its debut at the 1920 Olympic Games in Antwerp, Belgium. At the end of each Olympic Games, the mayor of that host-city presents the flag to the mayor of the next host-city. It then rests at the town hall of the next host-city for four years until the Opening Ceremony of their Olympic Games.

Gale Does "Dallas" & Other Guilty Pleasures

I was beginning to mourn the end of the TV season and the fact that the summer fill-in shows are usually awful.  My favorite shows right now are "Mad Men" (the original "Sex and the City" or better yet call it "Sex in the 60's!") and some of the History channel antique shows I watch with the family.

I'm thankful for reruns of "2 Broke Girls" that I missed the first go-round.  Though really racey for an 8:00 pm slot, it is hilarious!  The humor, puns and sarcasm are rapid-fire and it's produced by the fellow who did "Sex and the City."  The main premise is a dark-haired permanently broke waitress meets a recently broke blond heiress (her father went to jail for his ponzi scheme) who becomes a waitress at the same diner.  This heiress brings along her pet to live with them:  a horse named Chestnut that lives on their patio.  The girls are saving up to open their own cupcake shop, but many things stop them from saving very much.  There is a tally at the end of every episode and I think they are ahead perhaps $150.

Anyway, I digress...

For you young'uns... way back in the late '70s and 80's TV was limited to ABC, CBS, NBC and PBS. There were some large local stations, but not zillions of channels we have nowadays.  So, when a show was popular... pretty much everyone watched it.  The biggest night was Friday.  For young adults and older we had the "triple play" of "Knight Rider," "Dallas," and "Falcon Crest."  (I wasn't much of a Falcon Crest fan.)  Folks would meet at each other's homes or go out to bars to watch TV together.  You would plan your night around this.  (You couldn't record shows just yet.)

"Dallas" was a huge hit and it was a worldwide event to find out "who shot JR."  It was known as the "the shot heard 'round the world."  The show was about the oil wealthy Ewing family who lived on a ranch called "South Fork."  It was unabashedly flashy, dramatic and hokey, with huge plot issues that one had to overlook (mostly in the relationship department.)  The hardest issue to accept had to be when brother Bobby died and then a season or two later he came back because it was "only a dream."  He just shows up in a season opener in the famous "shower scene."  Boy, they expected a lot out of the audience!

Like many bad substances, "Dallas" was addictive.  I usually don't watch reruns of anything, but when the series came to TNT, I watched it every day while making the kids' lunch.  (There was a 10 year break though, so that's my excuse.)  There was comfort in the predictable...every party they had involved a fight with someone winding up in the pool--we would just try to guess who would be next.  They had the Oil Barron's Ball for glamour, nearly always including a "shocking reveal" to the guests.  They almost lost "South Fork" every season.  JR (black hat) and Bobby (white hat) fought continuously over Ewing Oil.

Conveniently, JR and Bobby both had sons to carry on the tradition because "Dallas" has 12 new episodes on TNT at 10 p.m. on Wednesdays.  The stars are the grown up boys with the old Bobby, JR, Sue Ellen, Cliff, Ray and Lucy coming and going during the show.  But now it has a young cast for the next generation which are of course all gorgeous and everything is updated technically.  (I still remember JR carrying a portable phone the size of a football.  Very hip then.)  There is still the same ole conniving, fighting, cheating and treachery of the original series though!

Here is a look at the main cast:  (taken from their webpage)

I just read that TNT renewed it for next season with 15 episodes, so you'd better hurry and catch up!

Happy viewing!
Gale